Hey, yep, it's me. Homesteader aka Nosy Rosy, aka White Dish Cloth, aka
Stupid Cat. Of course, we understand human. Come on. (I mean, you
haven't noticed by now that if you took the face of those "little green
aliens" in all those movies and put some fur on it and two little ears
what "species" it really is? Yeah, rulers of the universe--that's us.
Clever disguise, eh? Next time someone says, "Hey, look, a UFO!" Ask
him if he's seen his cat recently. But I digress.)
It's
rather a "mixed bag" having the human home all the time in the summer.
He gets a little lazy. I talk to him about it every morning--get right
in his face. Try my best to prod him--a few paws in the back--into
keeping on school time, but he tries to ignore me and actually sleep in a
little bit. Slaves. So useless at times. I need my breakfast chubby
old man. Get up already! Meow! He spends a lot of his mornings
outside, too. Something about it's being cool. Claims to be "working."
Probably just puts dirt on his hands to try to fool me. The problem is
he waits until the afternoon now to feed the entertainment. How am I
suppose to enjoy the bird life and those little furry varmints if he
hasn't put the bait--I mean, food--out yet. He does spend more time in
the green chair by the front doorwindow so I have a lap to sit in while I
watch the show, but I'm used to sleeping away the afternoon in that
chair with the sun shining on me. Oh, well, I guess I'll take what I
can get. But, i mean, why stay home all summer and not spend the whole
day catering to my needs? Senseless, right? And sometimes he tries to
put those paper things up in front of his face and block his lap.
Really? Like I can't nose them out of the way and flop down right in
his face anytime I want. Try reading then human! Always forgetting his
place in the world. Ugh. And then he likes to sit in front of this
thing and type stuff. I invariably let him know what I think of that in
no uncertain terms. Catonese can be a very colorful language. Whose
the boss of this place anyway? Silly human. Well, I need to go stretch
out in the chair in case he wanders in and thinks he can have it. Just
thought I'd fill you in on the goings on around here when the chubby,
old, bald human is home. Yeah, I know you were worried about me.
Don't. Rulers of the universe, remember? Be good to the cats--or else.
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